the unpredictable

i remember after my father passed away and life became more normal, my grief would appear out of nowhere and the sadness would be overwhelming. as the days pass, as we get into a bit of a routine, as sasha is always in my heart; i haven't had a real good block of time to grieve and the grief hits me hard. i miss her companionship and love and the routine i had with her. i review her last 6 months of life in my head and make a list of everything that went wrong. there are so many things i wish we had done differently. there were so many opportunities for improvement that got lost in all the chaos.
i am hoping that i can find the time to grieve so that it doesn't keep creeping up on me. i miss you peach....

2 comments:

  1. Hi Sweetie, as I was writing about the session with Heather Rivlin last night I was remembering how much you gave Sasha at every moment. You were both her rock and my rock, helping me be Sasha's advocate and recharging my batteries when I was down. Sasha's exuberance and determination came from you and I loved watching you dancing, laughting, swinging and playing. You turned so many moments into play and you made Sasha so happy. You were a devoted caregiver and had to learn things no parent should know. We tried to understand all and do all without knowing about her portal hyper tension. What we have learned we will pass on, you could not have done more.

    xo
    J

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  2. this picture is truly amazing.

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